dear humans that don’t know how to deal with me,

no, you are not alone.  there are, in fact, many of you.  maybe you could all form a support group to help each other cope with all the poop and garbage through which i put you.  wouldn’t that be nice?  you could bring lemon squares, and organize bakesales, and have board game night every second tuesday of the month.

and i’m not just saying this as an excuse to get you all in one place.   really.  i promise.