i can’t stand letting anyone down, so i end up letting everyone down. overload, freakout, drop all juggled balls, all spinning plates. lather, rinse, repeat till dead.

i have so much to do, as always, and i have to get everything under control before a new semester comes along to crush my soul. i am actually excited about my courses, my degree, which almost makes things worse, because you have so much more to lose when you actually care. i need a vacation, i’m telling you. a REAL one.